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Guys, I cannot explain to you how crispy I am from Reading. I mean, I got seriously toasted out there. My face half fell off today, I feel like a snake shedding its skin.

Plus I am allergic to Malibu sun mousse SPF 20, which I think has just added to the crunchiness.

But, on the upside, I can literally crack my face with a smile!

And I move to Manchester in 2 weeks and 3 days! Woo!

 
Today has probably been the single most strange day in a fortnight of weirdness, that counts as the oddest 14 days of my life.

London is blowing up, and even though I live in the burbs, I'm still pretty concerned. Though contrary to terrorist belief, London is not quaking with fear, it is just indignant that you chose to attack us.

I don't really know what to say about it all. My manager rang me to check I was alive, and told me to take the afternoon off work. The school concert has been cancelled, and I tidied up a bit around the computer. The confirmed dead figure rose to 37 as I threw away some old envelopes, and I got a package in the post box just before the last collection.

We won the Olympic bid yesterday as well; what's with that? The whole tube network was shut and someone blew up a bus.

I know the world went mad a long time ago, but this isn't madness anymore. This is just nasty. I'm still a bit miffed by the whole thing.

Bah.

 
Earth to iPod users!

Earth to iPod users!

MP3 players have been on sale for a few years now, in sizes up to and including 20GB, some probably more.

Apple didn't invent them, they just capitalised on a growing phenomonem.

Zen, among others, have been selling them for ages.

Go listen to some vinyl!

 
Have you ever really annoyed yourself? Irritated at every word that left your mouth? I usually only suffer this when I go at the Guinness (it takes two, baby), but this afternoon, I kept just pissing myself off.

It started with sighing. I was exhaling like melancholy was a breathing disorder. Then I kept asking people if they were alright. I knew they were alright, they'd said so about 20 times already! I was wandering round the shop looking forlorn, which was wasted for a long time as i was the only person on the floor, then I tried to sort my unruly hair out without the aid of my hands.

What was going on?! I feel much better now, but what was I thinking? How did I put up with myself? I needed a smack, but there was no one there for smacking! I can only attribute it to tiredness and that ruddy broken fire alarm that I had to evacuate for... with my cup of hot chocolate.

As I said, I'm now cured. What changed? Well, it could have been a mediaeval stylee medical treatment - straight after work, I gave blood! Back in the day, it was known as 'blood letting'. Could it be that those middle ageans had a point?

I doubt it. They didn't even have hypodermic needles. Is it hypo- or hyper-? Ah well, 'tis of little consequence now, I've got 1 pint less than I had a few hours ago.

Give blood. Or we'll take it ourselves.

 
I have rediscovered aniseed balls. They and their dark pinky sugary goodness rock. I have also discovered that rape seed oil is carcinogenic. I even found out that the aniseed balls from Cybercandy are the kind with the rape seeds left in. It may shock the more distracted amongst you to know that rape seed oil is made from rape seeds. Can I never win?!

In other news, Archimedes and Pearl are all but water vapour now, but their memory lives on in my phone. I'll post the pictures as soon as I figure out how to shrink them.

Okay, I'll be honest, I'm writing this to avoid doing my English coursework. It's due in tomorrow, and I'm hopeless at it. Thoroughly hopeless! My evaluation is about 10 lines long, compared to the four pages of solid 12 point Times New Roman that preceed it. And don't think this will be the last of my pointless-ramblings-to-avoid-real-work - my exams start in 6 weeks. Whooptidoo with added wup.

 
My darlings, I feel fabulous. Winter is finally over, and the rains are here!

I feel as though winter has lasted for a very long time this year. It started around the end of September and it's been grim ever since. I bear the scars, my dears, I bear the scars. But after that fit of snow that dragged on for two weeks, I think all it needed was for someone to build a snowman and the seasons could feel some kind of Christmassy closure.

Our snowman, by the way, was called Archimedes. Someone stole his head, so we upped his body and reconstructed him as a her around the back of the 6th form block. She was called Pearl.

But I can't understand why I'm in such a good mood - Ofsted are doing our school and were in two of my lessons today, my bus was diverted so I missed the first one, then the one I caught broke down on the way home and I had to walk through the rain, and I have loads of homework due, but I'm happy! I can't remember the last time I felt this good! I love it!

 
I said I'd tell you about my course, didn't I? Well I won't give you the full lowdown just yet, but I'll give a bit about some things I realised while I was there.

1. Romford is, as a town, homophobic.

2. I, hypocritically, categorised people by where they come from.

First things first. One of the guys I was hanging about with for the week was extremely gay. He said he'd 'camped things up,' but I suspect he's very camp in his normal setting.

Thinking of some of the people I know, he would have lasted all of 10 minutes before having the crap beaten out of him in Romford town centre. I've seen it happen, though the guy that got his shit kicked wasn't deterred by it, and still walks proudly around. And so he should! But why should he have been beaten up? Someone I know decided he hated him once he had figured out he was gay. I don't talk to this person anymore.

The same person, however, actively encourages lesbianism. Double standards, did you say? Yeah, I know. It pisses me off. So many blokes round here salivate at the prospect of girl-on-girl, then assume that, because a guy is gay, he must want to bum you because you're male. Get over yourselves! You ain't that pretty!

Talking to the guy on the course, he seemed almost shocked that I had such narrow-minded associates. It depresses me that I know so many people like it. But there seems an odd trend to it - the nearer you get to Essex, the more tolerant people are. The nearer to East London, the more phobic it gets.

That isn't to say that gay people don't come out in Romford, I'm just more concerned for their safety than I otherwise would be.

Secondly, I've been pigeon-holing people, and in doing so, pigeon-holed myself. Because there were people from all over the country, and because girls naturally seek out differences, I found region a good way to find things to talk about to other people. This generally consisted of how different it is between their home and mine, and in some cases, it made for very amusing talk.

I was also hanging about with a girl from central Essex, so we played on our Essex reputation a lot, me probably more so as I'm also from London (I don't really know where I'm from, nowhere wants to claim Romford). I told stories of fights, pregnancies and general misdemeanours, much to the enjoyment of the people from such nice schools. Sadly, I wasn't exaggerating.

By telling these stories, I think people got a regional idea of me, in much the same way I formed a regional idea of them, though my ideas of them involved far less pregnancies. Maybe I thought I knew. I don't know now, because I'm not in direct contact all day with these people now, so I've suddenly lost my suppositions. Maybe they only lasted for the first two days anyway! I'm not sure. But I do feel bad for having done that - instantly assuming things of people because of where they come from. Bah. At least I've learnt my lesson. Who knows, maybe I'm a better person now!